The Sweetness of Doing…NOTHING
““I have come to believe that caring for myself is not self indulgent. Caring for myself is an act of survival.” ”
Have you heard of the expression "il dolce far niente" as in the sweetness of doing nothing? Some of the earliest references to this phrase date back to the Roman Empire and can be found in the works of the renowned Roman lawyer Cicero. "Nihil agere delectat," meaning "It is a pleasure to do nothing." It was during high school when I used to translate from Latin that for the first time I came across this pivotal and simple expression that can truly contain such a wealth of cultural wisdom. It is fascinating how this idea has survived the test of time and become part of the cultural fiber of the Italian lifestyle, where people value relaxation and take the time to enjoy the simple things in life.
As an Italian who has lived in America for 20 years, I have become more aware of the importance of taking a break from our fast-paced lives. Many of my clients feel guilty when they don't have everything planned out…and so, maybe exploring the context for the ancient Roman concept of "otium" can ease that guilt a little. In fact, in Ancient Rome, "Otium" was not simply about doing nothing, it was rather a time to dedicate to intellectual pursuits such as reflection, reading, and of course, philosophy, the highest discipline. Indeed, just like in Ancient Greece, thinking was considered the highest privilege, and "otium" was a chance to escape personal and collective ambitions, especially political ones, to nurture wisdom that would ultimately serve people better. And of course, "otium" also involved enjoying other pleasures of life, such as socializing while drinking and dining at sumptuous banquets and getting pampered at the baths, which the Romans knew how to do well. The town of Pompeii and the thermal waters of Ischia were famous examples of the importance of wellness during that era.
Italians inherited the concept of "Il dolce far niente,” and so, in today's society, they do not view "il dolce far niente" as a guilty pleasure. Instead, it is seen as a way to honor what life is truly about, family, friends, and the little pleasures in life that are not expensive. In fact, Italians are known to be friendly and very social people, and thus, they prioritize spending time with others when they take a break from their daily routine. For example, sharing an espresso with a friend in the middle of the day, or showing up at a friend's house uninvited, but always welcomed, just to check in and say hi! Family is given, and friends are the family you choose in Italy. We come together to share stories, give advice, and enjoy each other's company, relieving the stress and pressure of life. And that is "il dolce far niente" at its best!
Taking time to do nothing is truly part of a lifestyle that values leisure and honors relaxation, allowing time to participate in activities that let us enjoy the simple pleasures of life, time to cultivate what we find important and what keeps us going. Therefore, it doesn't involve anything special or out of the ordinary. On the contrary, it is about the simple things that make us happy, the things that enrich us as human beings. Those values transcend my personal life to spillover my professional approach. As a coach, "Il dolce far niente" is about inviting clients to practice cultivating simplicity to motivate quality in their life. So from this perspective, doing nothing is actually productive because it allows us to nurture the true part of ourselves. It gives us a chance to just be not to do, recharge and feel better! By eliminating the guilt of not always having to do something, we can liberate ourselves and focus instead on the things that make us happy to cultivate a sense of well-being and happiness in our lives. By taking time to reset and focus on what really matters, we can be more productive and fulfilled in the long run.
I think we can all agree that it's essential to strike a balance between work and leisure, as it can significantly impact our physical and mental well-being. Taking a break from our daily hustle is crucial. This idea is not just a vacation indulgence, but a way of life that everyone can incorporate into their daily routine. Of course, I am not minimizing the need to be productive as critical for our financial status; but it's easy to get caught up in the pressure to do more and be more productive forgetting about everything. It's important to remember that you're not alone in feeling this way, and that it's okay to take a break and rest when you need it. Incorporating "il dolce far niente" into your life doesn't mean being lazy or unproductive. It means taking time to slow down, relax, and appreciate the beauty around you. It's about enjoying the little things in life, like savoring a cup of coffee, reading a book, or listening to music. When we take time to do nothing, we allow our minds to rest and recharge, which can help improve our overall productivity.
It's essential to understand that being productive doesn't mean staying busy every minute of the day. To be truly productive, you need to take time to relax, unwind, and recharge your batteries. Otherwise, you'll quickly find yourself feeling overwhelmed and exhausted. So, make sure to take breaks throughout the day, take some time to indulge in simple pleasures, prioritize activities that bring you happiness, and learn to appreciate the little things in life. By doing so, you can improve your overall well-being and take steps towards finding true fulfillment in your daily life.
Take a moment to consider your upcoming week. Remember, taking care of yourself is just as important as being productive.
Can you imagine taking a moment to do nothing….what impact would it have on your life?